Note: the following quotes can be verified at this website.
|"God made me do it."
-SATAN, after getting a kitten out of a tree.
|"Under Governor Bush's tax cut proposal, he would spend more money on tax cuts for the wealthiest 1% than all of the new spending that he proposes for education, health care, prescription drug and national defense all combined. Under my proposal, for every dollar that I propose in spending for things like education and health care, I will put another dollar into middle-class tax cuts."
-Vice President AL GORE, responding to a reporter's question, "Are you listening to this question or just waiting for key phrases like 'tax cut'?"
|"Ah, but is not the truly witty man he who has the least wit of all?"
-Author OSCAR WILDE, in one of his less nimble moments
|"Would someone hurry up and steal that car already?"
-NELSON WALKER, after listening to a car alarm outside his window for twenty minutes
|"Maybe all the country's problems would be solved if we changed our name to 'Lovey'?"
-JEAN-BERTRAND ARISTIDE's last-ditch effort to keep popular support and stay in office
|"You will not see that which approaches you if you fail to look in its direction."
|"Don't be fooled by the lox that I bought. I'm still, I'm still Jenny
from the block."
-JENNIFER LOPEZ, to a crowd outside a bagel shop
|"Yeah, 'Killing Me Softly With His Song' was a big hit, but for some reason the follow-up hasn't been selling as well."
-Former Fugees' lead singer LAURYN HILL, on her new single, "Killing Me Hard With His Guitar
|"... one nation, under God, or gods, or no god, or Goddess, or possibly Satan, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."
-new version of the PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE
|"We were rushed over in the National Guard - we were totally untrained in the Geneva Conventions.
How should we know what's right and what's wrong?"
-Private LYNNDIE ENGLAND
|"Merrill Lynch and Morgan Stanley engaged in questionable practices? Oh
no, what if that hurts people's faith in big business?"
-Consumer CHARLENE FOSTER
|"It's the stupid economy."
-BILL CLINTON, on Bush's stabilizing popularity and the apparent end to the recession in late 2003
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